Dear Mum

I do hope this letter finds you well. Having a lovely time on Planet Earth with the Mortals. It feels like ages since I was last amongst children, and I think I'd rather forgotten how noisy they are!

I must say, existence as a Sun God is turning out rather well. Having made my body from old clothes and a duvet, the youngest of the children designed me a very friendly face, complete with a happy smile and a big green eye. I've got to be honest though. I'm not entirely sure why I only have the one eye. But she seemed quite determined that that's the way it should be. Never mind. I'm not one to complain.

As you can see, they made a big fuss of me, and even gave me a nice hot cup of tea to drink. It wasn't quite the sacrifice I'm used to, but it was a nice thought, and I imagine goats and Temple Maidens are in rather short supply these days. Anyway, it was a perfectly fine cup of tea and it set me up nicely for a trip outside.

Of course, I wasn't always going to be a Sun God. Oh no, their original idea was that I was going to be Guy Fawkes. But after a lot of thought, the children decided that it wasn't really the best time of year for a Guy. Everything in it's place and all that.

So after a bit of internet browsing, they decided that I should be a Sun God, and that they would carry out the traditional pagan festival of spring, by burning an effigy of the sun in the hope that it would somehow lead to an early spring. Oh, don't ask me how that's supposed to work, mum. I don't make them believe this stuff. I just know it makes them happy

Anyway, as you can see, their bonfire suited me down to the ground. They'd spent ages making it; gathering up all the old wood that had laid about for ages. I don't think they'd ever had a living God in their field before, because if they had it would no doubt have been a lot tidier. Not to worry. By the time the wood was piled together, the whole place looked a lot better, an all I had to do was enjoy the view on such a fine day and wait for it to get dark enough to get cracking

You really can't beat a good blaze, can you? I'll admit that it wasn't quite as hot as the real sun, but still, it was lovely to feel those crackling hot sparks sizzling around me.

Well, my time on this planet might have been brief, mum, but I went out in style. No doubt the fact that I was stuffed with an old duvet helped matters a great deal. Top tip, mum: Should you ever feel the urge, don't smoke in bed! Soon enough there was nothing left of my mortal remains and I was back amongst the stars again, looking down over the world and the happy people gathered around the bonfire they'd made in my honour.

I can't promise spring will come any earlier this year, but it was a nice thought, all the same.

Until next time, mum.

Your loving Sun

Ray. x